Dear Jesus... Sorry I'm a cat.

My cat does not care if I want to snuggle or not. If she's in the mood, then my lap better be available and stationary for the time she has allotted me. And if she's not in the mood, then I better just get over myself. I accept it because I love her, and I'm a cat "owner" and I understand how finicky she is and so I don't take it personally.

It hit me the other day though that I am a cat when it comes to my walk with God! I am so on my own time schedule and have made it into this really one-sided relationship. And although I know that God loves me and understands me, better than I understand Juniper and her little idiosyncrasies, that doesn't excuse my behavior. Unlike my cat, I have the ability to reason and perform without only the base of instincts. I know that when I make time for God, things are so much better! So why can't I shake this cat-atude? I'm fallen and working on it. For now, I will try to have moments when I rise above the fur balls and cat nip addictions to make time for my Savior! Thank you Jesus for your patience!

Living poor

I'm wondering if I will ever travel again. I think I will, since it is something that is important to me. But for now, living poor and without a justification for travel, I feel like I should mourn traveling. I am grateful for the time I had with it and for the blessing of a good camera during most of my trips. I can't imagine not being able to travel and not having photos to remember the trips by. I would be either really sad or not as bad. What I mean by that is that I would either really miss traveling because I would have the weak photos in my mind to remember the amazing places I've been, or I wouldn't miss it as much because I wouldn't be able to see what I'm missing out on. Either way though - I miss it.

Generation duhhhh...

So the title might seem harsh, but I have some harsh opinions about some of the activities that the next generation is engaging in... and that the parents and leaders of these kids are overlooking. My husband works at a middle school in San Bernardino. His principal asked him to bring in a specific song for their pep rally last week, so the task fell to me to find it on itunes and burn it for him. Well I found it. And let's just say it took a lot of convincing for me to spend $1.29 to buy the "song" if you want to call it that. In fact, I found two versions of it - the explicit version and the "clean" version. I of course bought the "clean" version since it was for a pep rally at a jr. high. However, the only thing clean about it was that the N-word wasn't used and "bitches" was replaced with "females". The content was still garbage and was hardly worthy of the title "clean." Now this has been a common argument since the dawn of music - someone is always offended. However, I never really engaged myself in the dispute because it didn't affect my life. But now as a parent, I have a different perspective on what should be tolerated as "pep" rally material at a middle school. What happened to "We Will Rock You?" What are we teaching them when we pump in the message of oral sex and spending money like it's water to a bunch of already mentally challenged teenagers? I have one - trust me, he is mentally challenged at this age!! He may be capable of thinking, but it takes a lot of reminding to engage that common sense. So now, at their most vulnerable stage of development, we tell them that if they are worth anything they will get a girl to do things that she's not ready for and may lead to more little "duhhh's" running around, that they should beat other people up if they are challenged, that they ought to spend money on stupid things that don't last or mean anything - even at the cost of their basic needs, and that they better look out for themselves only, and don't trust cops. Excellent. Watch out world - here comes Generation Duhhhh to defend our honor.

It's resolutions time!

So... I haven't blogged in a while. Ever since all my friends and family members had their babies in the spring. I've taken some time off to quit my job, homeschool my children, get my teaching credential (done in May 2010), and loose just a bit more of my sanity. So now that it's 2010, I thought I would make a new entry in my old friend up blog. And what better to write about than New Years Resolutions (in my mind that sounded like a deep echo - like an announcer would in a low budget "sale" commercial). So here they are...

1. Stop Smoking!! Ok - so I don't smoke, but I wanted to start my list with a resolution that would be easy to check off. Kind of like a confidence booster. So... check.

2. Get employed. I would love to have all this new schooling pan out to something that pays. That would be nice.

3. Blog more... check.

4. Go to Disneyland. This was one of my resolutions last year. Cassidy (my 10 year old daughter), Jimmy (my brother), and I tried to check this one off for 2009 on December 29th - this past Tuesday. However, we found out - while waiting in the line to park - that Disneyland had in fact sold out! Did not know that was possible. So this year - we may start trying to tackle this resolution a bit earlier to make sure we can check it off.

5. Get my 10 year to take a shower by herself. This would complete my 10 year plan of getting both children to a point where they can make a sandwich, bathe on their own, and wipe their own behinds. My work here is almost done.

6. Have the talk... x's 2. Yes, this is the year of the "coming of age" talks. I have a feeling this is going to age me as much as it will them.

7. Stick to our restrictions. We have a few limits around this house and they tend to get lax when I get pooped. We are back to one hour of tv per day for each kid, one soda a day for me, read for an hour before playing video games, and no video games during the school week.

8. Save at least $200 a month - every month! I think I can... I think I can.

9. Find a devotions book that I like and will stick with. I do great typically until February.

and finally...

10. Gain 20 pounds! No - this isn't another confidence booster resolution. Although that would ironic to put this as one since I know I can check it off, but will loose a little self-confidence gaining even more weight. No, no... this is sorta like a reverse-psychology resolution. Typically I say I want to loose weight in the new year - and guess what - I gain. So this year I'm trying something different. Either way I guess I will gain confidence.

Well - that's it for now.